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Short Story: Cake In The Pipe


  1. ‘It’s bad doing business around here,’ dotted every sentence that Mr. Vincent Etinosa made in the thirty minutes I engaged him in a conversation.
    Mr. Etinosa is an Edo indigene doing business in Elelenwo in Obio/Akpor local government, Rivers State. He is a graduate of computer science and the CEO of Jerry Business Centre located at the Trans Elelenwo-Woji road junction linking Akpajo Town.
    I had gone to the centre, on the first floor of a two storey building to type and print a TV script that would be use for a public announcement in the evening.
    ‘To type and print is ten naira,’ Mr. Etinosa told me when I inquired of the cost.
    I did not hide my feeling and queried, ‘why?’
    He offered the explanation and expressed surprise that I was not aware of the prevailing cost.
    ‘And to print an extra copy?’
    ‘Thirty…thirty naira,’
    ‘Woa!’
    ‘That’s what we are faced with. It’s bad doing business around here. Imagine it…I run generator for twelve hours with two thousand worth of fuel every day…big expenses.’
    I look at him, listening with intent. ‘I have bills to pay, you know, my family, children at school, dependants…they have to feed. You know what it takes to put food on the table?’
    ‘Okay.’
    ‘I have to pay the two staff and maintain office equipment. It’s bad doing business around here, I must confess.’
    ‘I see.’
    ‘I pay rent for my resident and the office that amount to about three thousand naira. Don’t forget that I also have my life to live and take care off. Sir, it’s bad doing business around here.’
    ‘And you break even?’
    ‘I have a number of clients that subscribe to my network, strictly on agreed terms of twelve hours and when we bridge it, we offer two to three days service provision to make up the difference.’
    ‘That’s…’
    ‘We undertake system maintenance, others come with their laptops for use at fix rates, we offer scanning services, typing, cyber café services, supply of equipment and other little, little things we do to raise the bill to keep going.’
    ‘How long in the business?’
    ‘Here, its God that is helping us, others got frustrated using this place but for one year now we have been here. People believe you and trust you with business responsibilities because you leave home to an office.’
    ‘Really?’
    ‘But poor electricity supply stifle business raising the cost so high.’
    ‘But electricity supply is improved with the promised six thousand mega watts already running…I mean five hundred and forty already in supply.’
    ‘That is a lie, if there is electricity will it hide, my generator would not be steaming. But if they achieve that target they will not sustain it. In this country promises and good governance cake in the pipe.’
    ‘Cake?’
    ‘Fuel is scarce to buy, we patronize black market.’
    I felt pity for him though I was going to pay for the service. They sought out the change for me and as I made to go Mr. Etinosa said, ‘thank you sir for patronizing us.’



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